Literature The Marriage Issue

77 tried and proven ways to disrespect love

Poem of some of the obstacles the youth face in marriage.

By Carina Milena Maceira

The poem is a collage of first and secondhand quotes heard by the poet that reflect some of the obstacles that the youth face when it comes to marriage. They do not reflect her personal views.

she was my cousin it didn’t count

his mom kicked him out last time he said no

she’s not bedui

it was arranged

but he is bedui

i just want to make my father happy

his father has an iraqi passport

it’ll never happen

we should’ve parted ways the second we knew

it happens every day

i’ve given up

when are you getting married?


when are you getting married?


don’t you think it’s time you settle down?


who will teach your children how to pray if she doesn’t pray like us?

we’ve never heard of that last name before, how can we trust them?

we can only trace back their name a few generations

he must have a beard

keep it in the bloodline

their roots are slaves

respect the bloodline

don’t bother yourself with the difficulty

you’re too western

you must respect the tribe

he’s shia

their family roots are not strong enough to take care of you

their roots are irani

she doesn’t wear hijab

he says you must wear abaya

what kind of parents let their daughter study abroad?

what kind of girl doesn’t live with her parents?

don’t you dare


leave the discussion

where is his degree?

never anyone from that area

never anyone with that last name

the families will not get along, the rasul advised against it

they must be like us

when I’m dead will his divorced parents look after you and my grandchildren?

he is only half

we must strengthen their roots

everyone will die someday we must secure your future now

have you seen how many times he’s gone to dubai?

who was with him in thailand?

don’t you dare marry someone from the street, we marry amongst our own

someone that will elevate our status

she’s been married before

khalas, how dare you?

she was engaged before, she may as well have been married before

khalas, how dare you?

he has a kid

he has 5

none of their other daughters have been married

where did you find this girl?

of all people why him?

what happened to their family house?

where were they during the war?

were they here before the war?

the war

the war

the war

the war

the war

the war

the war

the war

the war

the war

the war

the war

the war

the war is always a good excuse

the wars they mention from ages ago that have laid their claims on our future

all one step away from giving up on love



it was never something we were taught to look up to yet we craved it nonetheless

assumed we’d have it regardless and now here we are

a lost generation without means to cope with our traditions

torn between duty and love

sacrifice and freedom

won’t you listen to us?

hear our grief?

you’re killing us softly

The views of the authors and writers who contribute to Sekka, and the views of the interviewees who are featured in Sekka, do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of Sekka, its parent company, its owners, employees and affiliates.

Carina Milena Maceira is a 20-year-old Cuban-Colombian poet and teacher. She grew up in America, primarily raised by her Kuwaiti family, adding to her multicultural identity that often shows in her creative expression. She is the founding editor of Ink & Oil Magazine, and an active performer in the Kuwait Poets Society. Her work has been published in Hooligan Magazine, The Miami Chronicles and Yes Poetry.